Saturday, December 26, 2009

Blind Date

The dim florescent lights flicker, she sits on the cold steel barstool
She's sipping brandy and searching around the bar with her eyes
She looks at the bartender and just as she's about to order another glass
"Come here often?" a rugged voice whispers in her ear, she turns
She thinks in her head he can't really be using this line can he?
"No, not at all. & you're helping me remember why." she glares at him
She notices the flecks of green in his steel blue eyes. His thin facial hair.
She also can't help but notice the subtle femininity gracing his face.
She can't help but be intrigued by his charm. She quickly comes to her senses.
"Uh, I'm waiting for somebody." She warns him, defensively, as if under attack.
"Yeah, I know. I'm Drew, I believe our friends set us up." He flashes a grin.
He notices her naturally blond, wavy hair. Her perky chest rising and falling.
And those deep, gazing hazel eyes piercing through him like lasers.
"Oh, you're Drew. You're 15 minutes late. Are your excuses as bad as your lines?"
She wonders why she's being so harsh. & why her heart is jumping out of her chest.
"Actually, just traffic. Mind if we go sit in a booth?" His eyes are searching her face.
All he wants is for her to relax. What had he done to her? 15 minutes, that's nothing.
Part of him wanted to leave but, a more persuasive part wanted him to stay.
"I suppose." She grabs her glass. She wants to leave. But, his charm has her in a grip.
"So," He sits next to, rather than across from her in the booth. "let's not play games."
His hand begins to move slowly up her thigh. He looks her dead in the eyes.
She feels his hand. She wants to stop him, no, she doesn't.
"Uh, you, I, we, I don't usually.." She wonders why she's stuttering. This isn't like her.
He puts his finger to her lips. "Shhh. You know why we're both here."
His voice is so deep. It's entrancing. She looks at him, longingly.
Was she really gonna do this on the 1st date? In the 1st 10 min?
He was sure of himself. That's what made him so appealing. He knew he had her.
"Come on. My place is around the corner." He whispered in her ear & gave it a little lick.
He slipped his hand up her shirt as she thought. Should she go? Would she regret it?
He leans in and kisses her. He tastes like cigarettes & mint. She doesn't mind.
She knows she's going to go. Her body won't let her do otherwise. She grabs her purse.
As they walk they give off vibes of sexual tension that everyone can feel.
Tension that will soon be relieved. Their body language is speaking volumes.
They are kissing outside his door as he fumbles for his keys.
He opens the door and they fall onto the floor kissing and breathing heavily.
He rips off her shirt, tearing the buttons and throwing it across the room.
She pulls off his shirt rapidly and kisses his chest leaving her lipstick stained.
She unzips his pants his bulge is poking through his boxers.
He lifts up her skirt and her underwear are drenched. He slides them to the side.
He plunges his fingers inside her and moves them in & out without caution.
She thinks it hurts. But from the pain comes extreme pleasure.
She moans louder & louder and begs him to fuck her.
He pulls his fingers out and shoves his dick inside her wet flesh thrusting his hips harder and harder.
She begs him to slow down but to no avail. He keeps thrusting he won't let up.
She screams for him to keep going even though deep down she wants him to stop.
He slows his pace and goes deeper. Penetrating her with increasing force.
She cries out begging him not to stop. To just keep going she's almost there.
He picks up his speed feeling his release approaching. He holds her down.
He feels it approaching he groans and collapses on top of her. She's scared and satisfied all at once.
He reaches over to his pants thrown a few inches over and pulls out 2 cigarettes.
They smoke. They sort of chuckle at each other. She lays on his chest
She listens to his rapid heartbeats syncing up with her own.
In that moment she knew she'd never regret this moment no matter what happened.
As she lay on his chest on his carpet, sweaty & out of breath. She hoped this would be a regular occurrence.
He had never felt so alive. He didn't know what to say. He hoped she'd stay the night.
She fell asleep in his arms that night & every night after that. & never regretted that blind date.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

If I Ruled My World

This was for an essay/poetry contest

This neighborhood I live in is driving me insane
I walk around the streets and feel so much pain
The pain of a little girl home alone ‘cause her mother would rather be out shooting up
The pain of a mother whose son got pulled into a gang and ended up getting shot up
The pain of a wife whose husband is out all hours of the night dealing
That’s why on my block pain, sadness, and worry are the only feelings
Kids run around and each one has a knife
I think to myself who would choose this life
A life where a child has to carry a shank
A life where teens are out there robbin’ banks
If I ruled my world my street would feel joy
No more pain for the mothers, wives, little girls, and boys

Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. had a dream one night
So, he used it to try and make things right
He helped change the world in his own way
But, now I look around these streets today
People using racist words as a term of friendship
The same words that have caused us so much hardship
We'd rather be picking up guns instead of books
We should be doctors but instead we're being crooks
Of course it's not all of us that's not what I'm saying
But most of our neighborhoods are slowly decaying
If I ruled my world Dr. King's dream would stay alive
And his inspiration would help us to survive

Seems our generation has lost sight
We remember the result but not the fight
Boys on the street when they should be in school
Girls letting men in without protection, acting like fools
The streets full of ignorance, trash, and trouble
Seems like our crime rate is starting to double
Most of the buildings are abandoned or have started to decay and rust
All of my friends are dying violently, ashes to ashes and dust to dust

I wish being Black didn’t come with so many generalizations
But most of all I wish we didn’t give them a reason for allegations
All addicts should be getting their lives back on track
And when convicts get out they shouldn’t go right back
Don’t drive through the white towns, just turn back
Or you’ll get a DWB and that’s Driving While Black
Police brutality and racial profiling go hand in hand now
And I just can’t seem to understand why and how
They can always find a way to keep us down
‘All men are created equal’ as long as your skin isn’t brown
If ignorance is bliss we must be on cloud nine
Kids only 8 cursing and thinking that it’s fine
I walk down the street and see crack addicts asleep on the walkway
I can’t stand this mentality any longer, there’s no way I can stay
I don’t know anymore what’s wrong and what’s right
I don’t see in color anymore, it’s all black and white
That’s not the way the world’s supposed to be
If I ruled my world we would all REALLY be free

If I ruled my world, dreams would come true
If you can make a change, I’d leave it up to you.
In my world, no voice will be silenced or stopped.
In my world, no suggestion would be criticized or dropped.
In my world, condoms would be handed out in school
In my world, there would be guidelines, not orders and rules
In my world, every child would have somewhere to go
In my world, no hospital or rehab can tell anybody ‘no’
In my world, a second chance would never be tuned away
Because in my world everybody knows people sometimes lose their way
If I ruled my world, this is how life would be every day
But, I don’t rule my world, at least not yet anyway

Tell me you didn't

Tell me you didn't feel what I felt.
Tell me how you never loved me.
Tell me again how you just liked the idea of us.
Tell me the truth & not the same bullshit
Tell me how your heart never raced just like mine
I heard it as I lay on your chest, you're lying
Tell me you didn't feel the sparks
The sparks everybody saw between us
Tell me every time you woke up
You saw her face, not mine
Keep telling me these things
Just so I'll get over it.
Move on.
Give up.
I won't.
It's all a lie.
We weren't
You're the only truth I've ever known.
Anything else is just, inadequacy.
The more you tear me down the more I come after you.
So tell me again how I'm not the one.
Tell me again that you don't want me.
But, can you at least say it & mean it?
That's the least you could do.

Leave it alone

Come on, I'm here...I'm not going anywhere.
I love you, you love me but you can't see
See past the door that closed when mine opened up
Slammed in your face but you keep running into it
I see what you are too blind to see
I see me. I see we.
But you refuse me.
Why is it that we all want what we can't have?
You can't have her, I cant have you.
Until you finally see what I see.
Me. Waiting. Like a fool.
I am a fool. For you. For us.
So, keep walking into that door.
Mine will always be unlocked for you.
But only if you're willing to turn the knob.

Look at me

So, look at me. Look past what you think you know.
Look past what you've seen before.
Look at me. Find what you're looking for.
Look beyond the surface. Look into my eyes.
See into my soul. You're the only one who can.
See past what I do & look past what I say.
I'm guarded. Why won't you see?
I let it down before, but you let me down.
So, now it's up. Take the time to look.
Tear down my walls like I know you can.
Get over it. Get into me.
Once you look, there won't be questions.
There won't be doubt.
Just see me, how I see you.
Just open your eyes.

Monday, December 14, 2009

Love Hurts?

See, they tell you when it's love
That it hurts
& that's how you know it's real
But see I don't think that's the deal
Cause see when it's real
It's supposed to be a constant euphoria
& even when it's bad, it's not that bad
& even when you fall asleep crying
You see that person in your dreams
But, see crying don't make it real love
& neither does pain
Sometimes pain means you gotta let go
& even though that seems hard in the end
You will reach your pot of gold
Cause love is a funny phenomenon
& you never know where it will take you
You make think you found that real love
Cause you run home crying every night
But the way I see it that ain't love, sweetie
The good should outweigh the bad
& the memories shouldn't make you mad
& you shouldn't be crying every night but
Once in a while ain't that bad
See, when you break up more than you make up
That ain't love.
When you start to believe all the bullshit
That ain't love.
They tell you they love you when it's convenient.
That ain't love.
Yeah, love can hurt.
Once in a while.
But, not all the time so see
Love don't gotta mean pain.
Maybe you just need to sit & think.

Sunday, December 13, 2009


I’m from America …the land of the judgmental and home of the hypocrites

Where they tell you to speak your mind but to stay in your place

To make a change but not to challenge anything or anyone

Where they tell you no child is left behind oh, except the 33% who drop out

Or the 20 percent that graduate high school as funtionally illiterate

But not left behind in school, just life, but I guess that doesn’t matter as long as they graduate right?

I am from America …from a place where I’m just another statistic

Just one of the lucky 75% of teen girls without an STD

America , where I’m just another sad stereotype of urban youth

Where I’m more likely to pick up a gun than read a book

America , a place where it’s OK to just be yourself, but, only if yourself is like everyone else

Where if you don’t follow the latest trend you’ll be a nobody

America , a place where you can marry the person you love…as long as you’re not the same sex

America , where nothing is, as it seems so you always have to read the fine print

Where people don’t get that the definition of racism isn’t just Whites against Blacks where everybody thinks somebody’s out to get them when we’re really just out to get ourselves

America, where 4,599 people ages 10-24 ended their own lives, and 42 million babies got theirs ended by a right…to choose. More like the right to lose.

America, where hate is taught in your own backyard, where 3 nooses hang to prove we haven’t come very far.

Where you can have a dream but only if you’re willing to die for it, where the past never dies, it just hides very well.

Where two million cocaine addicts can’t commit to12 steps and where 906,000 kids get hit and claim they ran into a door.

America, where 40 Million people are obese and 8 million are anorexic, where magazines promote a perfect weight and self esteem plummets with every page of “seventeen”.

America, where Big Brother keeps an eye on you, but only if you’re doing something wrong

Where 4 million wives and girlfriends get smacked around for “stepping out of line”.

Where looks and charm outweigh intelligence and capability, and where your kid is spewing curses before their ABCs.

America , where nannies raise children and children love nannies and sometimes-even daddies love nannies, which is probably why for every 1,000 people, married, 360 get divorced.

Where the Great Depression couldn’t be fixed with just a bottle of Zoloft.

Where over 1 million pre-k kids are on antidepressants, where the kids are more stressed out than their parents, where mommy drinks because she just can’t cope and where little Billy is the only 10 year old in rehab.

America , where your taxes pay for high-class hookers, no excuse me, escorts.

Where sheep can be cloned but AIDS can’t be cured.

Where everybody hates on the president but I bet they couldn’t do his job and where everybody loves Raymond, but don’t know who the 16th president is.

Where the news is too real but reality TV is just right.

America , where we’re all still slaves, slaves to ourselves, slaves to fashion, slaves to money, slaves to power…you get the picture.

America , where everybody wants to party like a rock star but none of them can name the members of the Republican Party

Where 2,258,983 prisoners rot in jail and OJ is set free saying “I didn’t do it, but if I did…”

America , where Hoover promised “a chicken in every pot and a car in every garage” but

Where 3.5 million people don’t even have a home ‘cause everybody knows, love don’t pay the rent and money can buy love

America the beautiful, with its smog filled skies and barren waves of grain

Where 37.5 million immigrants came to be free, because everybody’s looking for the american dream

Where the American dream has become a nightmare, where white picket fences have been replaced with picket signs

America , where some people spend their lives trying to get to…and why? Because it’s America , who wouldn’t want to live here?

Making Love

Your hands, my hands.
Your breath, my breath.
Your tongue, my tongue.
Touching me while I taste you.
Scratching my back while I'm inside you.
Come into me.
Feel me.
While I feel your body under mine.
Grind with me.
We're taking this too slow, baby.
Up against the wall.
Flesh pressed together.
Your tongue exploring my mouth.
Nah, turn the stereo down, I wanna hear you scream.
Tell me how much you like it when my tongue explores your clit.
Moaning my name.
I love you.
I love your body.
Your neck, your breasts.
I need you.
I crave you.
And the way we make love.